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Francisco Valenzuela Angel's story: My Haunted House

By Susan Gitenstein Assadi
Not every house is nice, friendly, kind from the outside they wear “masks” just like us humans are living situation isn't any less different. Well my house uses to be a relaxing, amazing place almost like a heaven to me. I felt secured, un-toxic safe from my social life in school. But that all change in a snap his finger at that moment deleting everything in front of me. All the feeling I had about my home being eliminated out of my mind. From back then to now it’s still the same as history repeating itself l like I was waking up the same day nothing had changed or even moved at all just waiting for me to wake up from my little nap from reality. Round 15 of this rotting hells named “home”. Were the true sight of my home coming out to play with my soul the mask behind my “good family”. Years past but no progress was done or changed. My home was a haunted house to me I can hear whisper of negativity, doubt, things I don’t want to hear. Stupid, idiot, why can’t you be like him or her, how are you going to live without me, you look disgusting in that, why are you like this... It’s like ghost are talking to me haunting me day and night those words and saying keep repeating losing my skill to even choice for myself. I doubt my skills and my ability to do any my test thinking about getting the wrong answer even though I was right. Telling me to choose a side mother, father, your sibling getting choose one. There so much fighting between the family the younger siblings getting hit in the cross fire. Valley’s and mountains have been created between party. Just like cavemen tribes. Fighting constantly like a never-ending war. Projectiles made of anger insulting words getting thrown around family members trust slowly crumbling down like ancient kingdom wall getting demolish out of existence. Everyone must make a mask just to talk to each other they try talking to each other normally but there needed required to be aggressive. Yeah that all can change but it but at this point. My life at home is a bipolar warzone I got to be careful in what I do. I must be useful at home if not my ears get blown up in insults like a land mine in the ground. My voice, opinions are ticking time bomb anything I say will be used against me. Anything I try to pleasure my mother her. The way to avoid it is to be quiet, listen, be a good boy. Like I was a slave. U couldn’t take it so I try to do something about the issue. I was defenseless a goodie two shoes not able to speak up. I was like a blood-filled punching bag getting hit by insult from in and outside my home. I used to not care until the events started to brew up. The words “hurt” me deeply crying silently in my bedroom not able to show my emotions because “guys don’t cry, and I will hit you to give you a reason to cry.” Those quotes made my soul harden I couldn’t share my emotion I try but my mouth didn’t benefit me to speak. I scream everything out of my head but all I can hear the silent out of mouth the wind coming out but no words. My mental state was unstable I get easily taken advantage. My whole life is all for my little sister she the only one I care for she the reason I wake up each day. That how my living situation is today. Now everything is starting to look up but every good thing has to end then one day I build of my confidence to come out of the closet I am sick of running and hiding. Time to be my very hero and be brave but the coming out to my mother has backlashed and backfired. My very own mother called me a she and I thought I will dress up as female to be with another man I have an attracted towards. But you must live with them even though they hate you and you hate them you can't do anything about it. Not everything is like it seems they are kind to you when you're there with them but before you leave to go home it turn into the devil's furnace for the rest of the family inside. Even though family, friends, coworkers whatever starts to push you down and throw you around like a rag doll just keep in mind. Your life is in front of you keep going even if life wasn’t to screw with it don’t let it, you're going make out this hell hole living happily the true happiness you been dreaming having your own home and life.
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Susan Gitenstein Assadi